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Teresa and I like to go to the cinema at least once a week, specifically on weekends. But lately, the act has become nearly impossible due to the lack of quality films being released. Last Friday rolled around, and we clicked through our Flixster app and (other than the already sold-out Wes Anderson film at Film Streams), the choices were Divergent, Muppets Most Wanted, Mr. Peabody & Sherman, The Lego Movie, 300: Rise of an Empire, Need for Speed. Seriously. If the choice is between seeing any of those or getting some Indian take-out and staying home to catch up on the DVR or Netflix, well, it’s pretty simple. I know it’s become popular these days to call this the “Golden Age of Television,” but the fact is most of the stuff on the major networks is as shitty as anything I remember watching on the tube growing up in the ‘80s; maybe more so when you consider “reality television” and garbage like The Real Housewives of… or whatever shitpool the Kardashians are wading through this week (Let me add my voice to the countless that came before me and ask how any of the Kardashians became “stars.” What talent, skill or wisdom made them anything other than shining examples of how to be human garbage?). And yet, there’s all these TV shows that are hands-down better than anything in the theaters: House of Cards, Game of Thrones, Girls, The Newsroom, Downton Abbey and the show I’m currently re-watching on HBO On Demand: True Detective. True Detective is the best television show I’ve seen in years, and an example of the kind of thing that could only be seen on television. Over the course of eight one-hour episodes, we not only see the evolution of an investigation of grisly, ritualistic serial killings that span two decades, but the emotional rise and fall of two central characters, played by the irascible Woody Harrelson and the ever-changing Matthew McConaughey, who’s currently enjoying the best “second act” of any Hollywood star. True Detective combines the eeriness of Silence of the Lambs with the long-form character development of The Sopranos. You simply cannot tell this kind of story in a movie theater. The choice would be to either cut the series down to two hours and remove all the elements that make it special, or break it into three parts and release it over three years (which would never work since the show contains no elves or laser beams) or force audiences to sit in the dark for eight straight hours (which, in this case, isn’t a bad option). Or air it on HBO or Netflix or whatever cable and/or Internet-based service you prefer. I say all this and then you counter with American Hustle or 12 Years a Slave or Dallas Buyers Club. But those films, which clearly target an adult audience, are becoming rare amidst the plethora of adolescent bullshit that clogs today’s marquees. Hollywood’s answer to that criticism is that kids go to the movies, kids are where the money is, and that the grown-ups are more apt to do what grown-ups do: Stay home with their Indian take-out and watch Netflix. I can’t argue with that. Still, on a Friday or Saturday night I’d rather be sitting in the dark with a few hundred people taking it all in with a picture that’s bigger than life, and without the option of pressing the pause button when I have to go to the bathroom. My editor (not John Heaston, but Teresa, who reads everything before I submit it to The Reader) pointed out that Film Streams is the exception to the Hollywood rule, and she's right (as per usual). Since Film Streams' Ruth Sokolof Theater opened in 2007, it has consistently shown quality adult-oriented films and continues to be the obvious alternative to the usual superhero/zombie/coming-of-age bullshit shown at the multiplexes. We would have seen The Grand Budapest Hotel (now showing exclusively at Film Streams) last weekend except screenings were sold out by the time we made up our minds. Film Streams also might be evidence of the cinema-viewing age gap. When it first opened as part of The Slowdown complex, I expected the average audience at screenings to be dominated by young midtown and downtown hipsters, the kind of folks I typically run into at indie rock shows. Instead, it's not uncommon for Teresa and I to be the youngest people in the audience. I wonder if that's what Film Streams’ visionary founder, Rachel Jacobson, expected when the theater's curtains first parted. An update on my DuoLingo column from a few weeks ago: I’ve finally given up on the iPhone app that approaches learning to speak a foreign language as if it were just another game like Words with Friends or Candy Crush. After four months, I made it as far as Level 8 and “Object Pronouns” before I began to fall further and further behind, unable to make it through lessons without “running out of hearts,” the app’s wise old owl teacher ever in tears at my failures, all the while forgetting what little I’d learned in earlier lessons. The game went from being a fun diversion to being a constant reminder of how stupid I am, how I’m doomed never to speak Spanish. The idea behind DuoLingo was too good to be true. Still, the experience left me with that much more respect for those I meet from another land stumbling through our own foreign language. Over The Edge is a weekly column by Reader senior contributing writer Tim McMahan focused on culture, society, music, the media and the arts. Email Tim at tim.mcmahan@gmail.com. (We're testing Facebook commenting (you can login using other services, too); please let us know if you have trouble. No related articles. 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